We bore it all... but it’s not what you think. Local wellness brand Hedonist aims to destigmatise conversations about sex with its events. Here's every juicy detail of what went down.
In a society that leans more conservative, it isn’t easy to talk about sex. In fact, it’s almost taboo. Sex education in Singapore usually comes in the flavour of fear-mongering abortion videos and the values of abstinence. At least that’s how it was for me. There’s very little taught about your own biological anatomy. Confession: I couldn’t wrap my head around menstruation and how that works until my first period.
Now that I’m all grown up, I understand logically that sex is nothing to be ashamed of. But it’s not exactly a topic I get to slide into everyday conversation. Thankfully, I’m not the only one who feels this way. Meryl and Jacqueline of the Apogee Collective are breaking the stigma around sex, one Hedonist Singapore private party at a time. It’s a space to let your mind run wild with questions as a pleasure consultant shares seductive tips and tricks on how to spice up your sex life. And I had the chance to try it out with the Honeycombers team.
All the delectable details of our Hedonist private party experience
After my first few invitations to the party were rejected, I thought I’d have a hard time trying to put together a group of colleagues. But I soon found members of my team who were just as curious as I am (thank you, Lucky Girl Syndrome). Our group varied a lot in terms of sexual experiences. Some of us were beginners, having almost no previous encounters, while others were veterans that dabble in kink play and have had unconventional sex. What we did have in common? A collective curiosity for what a Hedonist private party entailed.
Before that, I hopped on a call with Meryl to tie up the finer details. The party comes in three parts – icebreakers, pleasure topics, and sense-based seduction techniques. Out of the four options, we picked “Intro to kinks: BDSM 101” and “Unlocking different types of orgasms: Pleasure anatomy 101”. We hear if you choose the blowjob topic, you’ll be asked to bring a vegetable along!
Meryl also spent some time getting to know us individually to customise activities or tailor our conversations to best suit our curiosities. And she made sure to note any topics that were off-limits. With all that sorted, there was no going back.
“What did I sign us up for?”
That was my first thought as we entered Hedonist’s private party space in Singapore. After going past pink curtains that bore resemblance to some very familiar anatomy, cushy sofas and carpets welcomed us into the room. At first glance, nothing seems out of the ordinary. Until you start noticing the displays of vibrators, lube, and leather masks. Not forgetting the literal silver platter of sex toys you can’t possibly ignore.
As you can imagine, our first few minutes were awkward. We tiptoed around each other, taking turns to sheepishly sip our drinks as we made small talk with Jacqueline, our host for the night, to fill the silence. Segueing into the icebreaker games, I briefly worried that not everyone would be keen to share their experiences. But our shyness was hilariously short-lived.
It’s getting hot in here
When the Hedonist team says you’ll be tickled pink with laughter and tears, believe them. Once we got the ball rolling, there was barely a quiet moment. We dove straight in with a not-so-innocent game of Truth or Dare. In between questions about our most or least favourite sex positions and dares like lap dances, we unleashed juicy details about our sex lives. We talked about the good, the bad, and the ugly of ex-partners, unsuccessful threesomes, and spicy dreams that left us wanting more. There were discussions about gender identity, the fluidity of sexuality and the segregation of emotions from the act of sex.
Next, we addressed our topics of choice. This involved a throwback to secondary school days with a worksheet. As embarrassing as it is to admit, it revealed how little we knew about our own bodies from an anatomical perspective. But that was the point after all – to learn. The Hedonist team even prepared statistics that really put into perspective the importance of understanding pleasure anatomy. Is anyone surprised that only six out of 10 women experience an orgasm in a heterosexual relationship? ‘Cos I’m not.
But the most exciting part was getting elbow-deep into the sex toy collection. We were fascinated by toys that varied from adorably-shaped vibrators to dildos and so much more. Some even had nine different vibrating modes!
Before we bid our hosts farewell, we received a pleasure kit. It came with a satin blindfold, paddle, and a Hedonist card game featuring 59 cheeky truth cards and 10 naughty dare cards, which will make the next get-together with my friends very interesting.
Getting our heads out of the gutter
Despite the team’s diverse sexual backgrounds, we all found the session enjoyable. Besides learning way too much about each other, we developed a better understanding of pleasure points for the male and female anatomy. We were introduced to a huge array of sex toys, some of which could pleasure both partners at the same time. And we had long chats about our sexual insecurities and the basics of BDSM. Not to mention the A-Z list of kinks.
But for me, the best thing about this experience was our host. Jacqueline did an absolutely phenomenal job of easing us into discussions. It’s a safe space for those with little to no bedroom experience to ask questions, while others who are more adventurous will appreciate being able to speak freely about fetishes and sexual exploration.
So, whether you’re an intimacy newb or a pleasure pro in Singapore, these Hedonist private parties are the perfect place to engage in guilt-free conversations about sex. It isn’t entirely scandalous either – it’s not just gossiping about your body count. You get to talk about consent, introducing kink in the bedroom, and getting comfortable with your body for your own pleasure. While some of us learned more than others, we all agreed it’s a refreshing experience to try at least once.