From Ramadan to Ramadusk, the month went by fast. But what’s the experience like, and what did I do? Let me walk you through…
And just like that, the fasting month is over. I’m Ramadone! No more interrupted sleep, no more growling stomach in the afternoons, and no more instances of colleagues shooting me pitying looks when I tell them I’m fasting. While these incidents are on par with the fasting month, it goes beyond that. So, being the big-hearted person I am, I’d like to share my Ramadan experience for you to understand what traditionally takes place and what I got up to during this time. The next time I meet the holy month again, this piece will be a fond read (for me).
A little disclaimer: everyone’s experience differs, so please don’t take my word as gospel. I can’t speak for all Muslims!
Guess who’s back, back again…
For the longest time, I’ve been indifferent to the fasting month. This year, however, I reacted differently. I still remember how I felt – as if it only occurred yesterday…
I was in my room that Wednesday night. “We start fasting tomorrow,” I thought. Suddenly, I was overcome with emotion. My eyes started tearing up, and eventually, I was a sobbing mess. Remember that scene in Grey’s Anatomy when Cristina Yang cried so severely that she demanded to be sedated? At that moment, I felt like her. I crawled into bed, wrapped myself in my fuzzy blanket, and cried for a few minutes. When I thought I was done, my eyes watered, and the crying game resumed.
Many Muslims consider it a blessing to be able to usher in Ramadan each year. Perhaps I felt that too. Eventually, I stopped crying, and a zen feeling took hold. There and then, I had a feeling it’d be a good month. I was looking forward to it.
When you call my name, it’s like a little prayer
The fasting month is a great time to strengthen existing bonds and foster new relationships through iftar sessions and communal activities. One event I participated in that stood out was an interfaith iftar organised by Quasa SG, a Muslim non-profit. I found out about it through a friend and quickly registered my interest. Free food and a multi-religious gathering, what’s not to love?
In true Malay fashion, the event didn’t start on time. The organisers apologised for being late (oops) before diving into a short lecture which highlighted the meaning of Ramadan and misconceptions about it. After that, we were separated into smaller groups. I wasn’t keen on that (I just wanted my food!) but at least my friend was in the same group as me.
My group didn’t interact with one another initially. We were too engrossed in eating and kept to the people we knew. I suppose we were all just too hungry and shy. Finally, we went around introducing ourselves, our relationships with our faith, and a misconception we wanted to highlight. I introduced myself by declaring I’m “60% Muslim”, which made everyone laugh.
Overall, I’m glad I took part in the event. It was heartening to see like-minded people together. Granted, I didn’t talk to most of them, but being part of the sesh was a consolation. More importantly, the session allowed me to reflect on my faith. I’m not a religious person, and my relationship with my faith is… tumultuous. This event opened my eyes and heart to Islam again.
Let’s go to the bazaar-zaar, let’s go get a wave
Speaking of religion, one thing folks do religiously this month is visit the Ramadan bazaar at Geylang Serai. I’m the opposite – I’d rather be caught dead than be there. The massive crowd and humidity are major turn-offs for me. I can’t remember the last time I stepped foot in the bazaar. The closest I got to it this year was when I went past it a few times. Geylang’s Ramadan bazaar still looked the same from the outside, but my siblings said there were more activities and everything was too expensive. Well, that’s inflation for you.
While I didn’t visit the bazaars in Singapore, I willingly went to a couple of them across the Causeway. Who would’ve thought! It only happened because a friend shared some Instagram posts which got me curious. Plus, I was in Johor Bahru almost every weekend during the fasting month.
The bazaars in JB were more exciting to explore, largely because of the food. There was a huge variety, and most couldn’t be found back home. At the Ramadan bazaar in Angsana, I had a hard time deciding what to get. In the end, I went with nasi lemak ayam berempah, which is rice steamed in coconut milk with spiced chicken. The rice was fluffy and fragrant, and the chicken was juicy and flavourful. But what I liked most was the curry, which was both spicy and sweet.
Do I really hate Ramadan bazaars? Perhaps I’m just bored with the ones in Singapore. Will I go back to JB’s bazaars? I suppose I will.
Gimme gimme gimme a naan after midnight 4am
While much emphasis is placed on iftar this month, I want to talk about the less-discussed Ramadan meal – the sahur. The pre-dawn meal is meant to help reduce hunger and sustain energy levels throughout the day. In the past, my mother would wake me up and we’d have sahur together. In recent years, I chose to eat on my own. I wanted to decide when and what to eat for my pre-dawn meal.
Previously, I’d only have oats for sahur. It’s easy preparation, doesn’t take long, and I could quickly return to bed. This year, I came across an Instagram post recommending proteins, such as eggs, nuts, and Greek yoghurt. Okay, that’s doable. I bought two tubs of Greek yoghurt, which lasted almost until the end of the fasting month.
It went well the first week. I felt full throughout the day. I could still keep up as if I wasn’t fasting! E-N-E-R-G-Y! It’s like those sanitary pad commercials, except I’m not wearing any pads, and this is about sahur. Unfortunately, like most of Taylor Swift’s relationships, this regime was short-lived. Eventually, I felt the hunger pangs and could hear my stomach growling loudly at random times of the day.
I gave up the protein diet by the third week. Our eggs were running low and I was getting sick of Greek yoghurt. That Instagram post was a scam and a half! However, I’m not opposed to trying the diet again. Maybe I just wasn’t eating enough…
Wake me up when Ramadan ends
Many have asked me how I survive without eating and drinking all day. The short answer is: I’ve been doing this for so long that it’s become second nature. But honestly, it’s not the hunger that does me in – it’s the lack of sleep. The daily interrupted intervals eventually crept up on me. Even when I thought I’d slept enough, I still felt tired by mid-day.
When I told my friend I was over the fasting month and couldn’t wait for it to end, I was chastised. “It’s only one month in a year; just endure it for a bit longer,” they said. I know I was being a brat. I just wanted my regular sleep routine back! Yes, this behaviour was wildly different from a few weeks back, when I was feeling good and looking forward to the month.
During the last week of Ramadan, I decided to have my pre-dawn meal earlier before I turned in. I wanted to acclimatise my body (and mind) to my regular sleep routine again. Yes, slumber trumped sahur. Did it work? I’d say yes, but there was still some lingering tiredness. Maybe it’ll take another week or two for me to “recover”.
Goodbye my friend, it’s not the end
By the time you’re reading this, the fasting month’s officially over, and it’s time for Syawal and Hari Raya Aidilfitri. That means 30 days of feasting, forgiveness, and friendly relations. Hurrah!
While I’m happy I made it through another year of fasting, I can’t help but feel regretful that Ramadan has left us. Initially, I didn’t think I accomplished much in the entire month, but looking back as I write this, I realise that’s not entirely true. I participated in an event which led me to reconcile with my faith. I managed to overcome my displeasure towards Ramadan bazaars by exploring new ones (albeit out of the country). While these reflections are great, they don’t detract from my melancholy.
Why am I sad that it’s over? Despite the hunger and sleepiness, I felt peace during the fasting month. Now I’ll have to work extra hard to remain calm and chill, especially in adversity. But that’s where faith comes in. Ramadan is when your relationship with religion is reignited, and after that, it’s about continuing to fan the flames.
Muslims are always reminded to be thankful that we’ve managed to observe the holy month and pray that we can see it again soon. So here’s hoping I’ll see Ramadan again next year. If God wills.