When I turned 25, my first thought was, “Here comes the quarter life crisis.” Early adulthood can be tricky, but here are the 25 lessons I learned so far.
Realising that I will have completed another circle around the sun and turn 26 next week sure gives me the jitters. But at the same time, knowing I’ve had the strength to handle my anxiety, overcome pressure from school, and slowly let go of my fears over the last 25 years makes me appreciate how far I’ve come. And though I’m still scared stiff of the uncertain future, there are many experiences, people, and lessons that have helped me become more courageous and confident.
I am not that wise and, heck, there’s so much more to life than what I’ve faced thus far. But here are 25 (some more lighthearted, some less) things I have learned at 25.
1. Making your bed first thing in the morning makes all the difference.
My initial thought process was always, “Why make my bed when I’m going to lounge on it all day anyway?”But there’s this subtle burst of energy when you make your bed in the morning. And it helps me pretend like I’m a morning person, which in turn, gives an extra boost of productivity (though some days I work like a sloth). And, well, making my bed has helped me find the lost pair of socks I was looking for or my earbuds, so win-win.
2. Go out of your comfort zone.
Yes, I know this sounds cliché but there’s little growth when you huddle up in your comfort bubble. And no one needs to throw themselves out there altogether in one go, take baby steps cause slow and steady wins the race.
3. Set some time aside every day for yourself.
Naturally as an introvert, I need some alone time to recharge every day, even if it’s for five minutes. And it’s totally okay to shut yourself in your room and unplug in your own way. You don’t have to be present to everyone all the time, especially when you know your energy is running low.
4. You have a voice, use it.
Back in high school, a teacher told me, “I sometimes forget you’re in class because you never ask questions.” I was extremely anxious and felt shy about raising my voice until I was about 20. But what my teacher told me has stuck with me. I know I want to be seen and heard and so, even now, I’m plucking up the courage to speak up and it gives me hope that I can create the impact I want to one day.
5. Taking care of another life form has its rewards.
Plants, plants, plants! Oh and my goldfish! Nothing says #adulting like feeding my hungry goldies and watering my plants. When you take care of another life form and witness its growth, you can’t help but give yourself a pat on the back. You are taking care of a life, how beautiful is that? My goldfish better be grateful!
6. Don’t overthink about how others will perceive you.
I wish I could tell my younger self this a thousand times over. I still worry about what others will think of me, but the voice in my mind reminds me that I am worthy. And that comes with practice. Literally no one will remember an embarrassing thing you did, except you.
7. Movies and cinema time are essential for an escape from reality.
Is this the real life or is this just fantasy? (I just had to, I only recently watched Bohemian Rhapsody) Growing up as a movie buff has its perks. For one, I pretended my pencil was a wand as I whispered “Wingardium Leviosa”, and two, movies still give me a nice escape from reality (unless it’s a thriller, but I still watch it anyway). Also, I’d be lying if I said movies don’t have an influence on me as a person. There are so many movies that have changed my perception of negativity and helped me grow.
8. Don’t force yourself to do things you’re not comfortable doing.
Going out of your comfort zone is one thing, but then there’s forcing yourself to do something you’re clearly not comfortable doing, and that never ends well. Sometimes we want to give in to peer pressure, or we want to build an image for ourselves, but we need to stop and ask if it’s worth it.
9. Blast your favourite music.
I have my own karaoke at home all the time and that irritates the hell out of my sister but it makes me feel electrified! (Sorry not sorry, sis!) Listening to your favourite song(s) is therapy, my friends.
10. Don’t give in to societal pressure.
Society will always set a salary to aim for, an age to get married and start a family, a job that’s considered “reputable”. But no one knows what’s best for you other than yourself.
11. Cartoons never get old, like ever.
I mean do I have to explain this one?! I loveeee (yes, the extra “e”s are very much needed) cartoons, not just because I get to preserve my childhood, but also, things don’t always have to make sense in cartoons. Same outfit every day and no laundry? No problem. It’s the carefree attitude of cartoons that I crave, and also, what’s not to like about Baby Looney Tunes?!
12. Have a purpose in life and set both short term and long term goals.
It’s okay to not have your life goals figured out but, personally for me, I cannot drive myself without having a purpose. On days when I feel lost, I remind myself of the impact I want to leave behind and the goals I want to achieve and it gets me back on track.
13. Learn to love yourself and spread that love to others.
With every small step you take towards self-love and self-care, spread that love to others as well. Being kind to yourself is so important and when you’re kinder to yourself, you empathise more with others.
14. Surround yourself with people who understand and support you.
When you have someone who listens to you, don’t let them go. They will build a support system that’ll be your rock.
15. Failure is okay! You can’t always succeed in what you’re doing.
I tried learning new skills with a hopeful mindset that I’ll succeed. And I’m always hard on myself when I fail, but failing is what makes us human. If everyone is always successful, there will be no need for TedX speakers. And can you imagine what we’d do without motivational speakers?
16. Investing money and managing your finances from a young age is important.
We were all a broke student at one point, but oh well. While it’s important to save money, it’s equally important to invest and have your money grow. It doesn’t have to be a risky investment, just a decent amount of growth that builds over time. (BRB, I still haven’t set up my investment account.)
17. It’s never as bad as you think it is; overthinking kills.
You know when Doctor Strange is thinking of every possibility in Infinity War? That’s me for every minor inconvenience and I’m sure people can relate. Overthinking may have saved me at some point but I have learned that it’s never as bad as you think it is. I also do blame Google for telling me I could have a deadly disease on multiple occasions.
18. Mental health is just as important as physical health.
Seeking professional help for my anxiety is one of the best decisions I’ve made. We consult a doctor when we’re physically sick, so why not do the same when we know we need help mentally?
19. Write down your thoughts.
It doesn’t have to be journaling, or a “Dear diary” moment, just writing down a sentence helps too.
20. Embrace solitude.
Have you tried dining by yourself or going to the movies alone? We need to embrace solitude as we’re the only ones who are going to be there for ourselves all the time.
21. Nature therapy is free and underrated.
Bless Hong Kong for its lush mountains and calming waves. But nature therapy anywhere in the world is the best way to unwind. Nature makes you feel so small, but in a good way by providing perspective. It makes you realise your problems are not bigger than this world itself and you’ll eventually overcome them.
22. Learn how to use tools.
I’m always in awe of how my parents are so nifty when it comes to fixing minor issues around the house, or assembling small pieces of furniture from IKEA. Bob the Builder, can we fix it? Yes we can!
23. You are what you eat.
Mindlessly eating not only puts on unhealthy weight but it makes you feel sluggish. Caring about what we’re consuming will only benefit us. Goodbye, cookies (okay maybe one bite won’t hurt, but just one!).
24. Limit your usage of social media.
Transitioning from MSN Messenger to MySpace to Instagram – the change is not only about the advancement of technology, but also about how much more dependent we’ve become on social media. And without realising, we compare ourselves to others and it can become toxic. Knowing when to log out of Facebook, Instagram, and so on is key.
25. I like making lists!
Whether it’s for groceries, gift ideas, places to go, things to do, 25 things I have learned at 25, anything really. I guess this is why I’m in the editorial field hehe!