One day, social media will implode and no longer will we have to have Instagram and Facebook accounts just to feel relevant or to do our jobs, but until then...
Social media is a strange phenomenon and not in an LL Cool J kind of way. You see, it came around and none of us were really taught to use it in a way that wouldn’t impact our lives and the lives of those around us negatively, and thus we have been #blessed with the advent of the selfie, the boomerang and countless other quirks that owe their existence to social media.
As much as Facebook, Instagram and other platforms are a great way to keep connected with friends and family in other countries, they have also opened the door to a number of not-so-magnificent beasts that lurk inside many otherwise lovely human beings. So here’s a list of all the annoying social media posts that I hope will die in 2019.
Stop the insanity! Annoying social media posts that drive us all crazy
#1 Gym selfies/videos
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Sometimes you just got to smile through the pain! shout out to my side piece @trizzlegus for the new joggers! #fitness #posing #gymselfie #fitnessmotivation #bulking #fitfam #flex #proudbutneversatisfied #npc #ifbb #nofilter #gymlife #fitnessjourney #moretocome #staytuned
Sorry-not-sorry, but unless you work in a gym, I don’t want to see your gym selfies! You went to the gym; big deal, this is not exciting news for me. The fact that I know the ins and outs of your body more thoroughly than I know that of my significant others’ is pause for concern.
Alternative: Photos of cute kittens. They never get old
#2 Uplifting quotes
While some people find these, well… uplifting, inspirational quotes can actually cause more harm than good. I don’t need to be reminded that I’ve accomplished very little during the course of the week or that my dreams will come true if I put in the work. I’ve been putting in the work for well over five years now and I’m still not the star of The Real Housewives of Hong Kong. THEY ARE LIES!
Alternative: Write a journal in a real book (those things with the paper in the middle)
#3 Alluding to something good or bad but without any follow through
“Wish me luck, you guys. I’m gonna need it!”
“Why do things like this always happen to me?”
You’ve seen the cryptic post, and you may have even followed up with a well-intentioned message to no avail. Honestly people, just get drunk and spill the beans like the rest of us, or don’t say anything at all.
Alternative: Get drunk and spill the beans
#4 Sharing countless amounts of memes on the regular
I actually don’t think I’ve ever found a meme funny, but we all have that person in our life who plugs up our feed with memes about Donald Trump, Jesus, The Kardashians and anything else they can get their hands on. Where do you even find these things? There’s something to be said for enjoying a wee chuckle to yourself if you see something humorous scrolling by, just feel free to not hit the Share button.
Alternative: Just don’t share memes
#5 Hashtagging and location tagging children
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可愛すぎて何回でも観れる😭💓 画面に映ってる自分に向かって全力でバイバイ笑 結構喜んで乗ってくれたり押して歩いたり音楽鳴らしてみたり、気に入ってくれて買った甲斐あったー👏🏻 母はもう癒されまくってずっと爆笑🤣 父もカメラの後ろでにやにやにやにやしとりました💋笑 #りりちゃん #生後1年 #一歳 #12月生まれ #女の子 #女の子ベビー #女の子ママ #コンビカー #自分大好き娘 #最高かよ #可愛さ #最高級 #可愛さ爆発 #ベビフル #ママリ #ベビスタグラム #バイバイ上手 #baby #babygirl #byebye #drive #love #children
I just think that it’s super weird to always hashtag your child’s name from birth. What happens when #crystalannepearce grows up and her HR manager background checks her for a great role at a leading legal firm, only to find images of #crystalannepearce standing naked and crying aged three at a Teddy Bear’s Picnic? It’s great to see pics of the littlies occasionally, but be careful what information you’re putting out there for anyone to see, friends.
Alternative: Print nice photos and enclose them in a letter
#6 The boarding pass pic
Look, I’m super pumped that you’re going on holiday, but why not just enjoy the wait at the airport and take some pictures when you actually arrive at your destination? Also, why are you not getting your boarding pass on your phone and helping save the trees?
Alternative: Drink more wine in the airport lounge and forget about social media, you’re going on holiday!