{"id":285111,"date":"2023-11-23T20:43:56","date_gmt":"2023-11-23T12:43:56","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/thehoneycombers.com\/singapore\/?p=285111"},"modified":"2023-11-23T20:43:56","modified_gmt":"2023-11-23T12:43:56","slug":"matthew-perry-death","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/thehoneycombers.com\/singapore\/matthew-perry-death\/","title":{"rendered":"No one told me life was gonna be this way, but here\u2019s what Matthew Perry\u2019s death taught me"},"content":{"rendered":"

I was six when the final season of Friends aired in 2004. I don\u2019t remember much during my formative years, but I do remember the episode when Chandler and Monica got married. Fast forward to 2023, and I\u2019ve since binge-watched<\/a> all 10 seasons at least six times already. It remains relatable despite the series being almost 30 years old, and it\u2019s something my friends and I bond over constantly. We like to joke about how we all naturally fell into each Friends role (take a guess which one I am), and playfully jabbed at our group\u2019s Joey, offering him a place to stay when he grew old.<\/p>\n

You can only imagine the shock when the world was rocked by the news of Matthew Perry\u2019s death. A pillar in our pubescent years taken far too soon. I was stunned when I first read the headlines, thinking it could\u2019ve been a prank. Parasocial relationship aside, I found myself in disbelief because I watched him on screen for so long, it was hard to comprehend that he had passed. And being the person that I am, I\u2019m out here mourning the best way I know how \u2013 writing about lessons I\u2019ve learned from his life.<\/p>\n

Check in with the funny friend<\/h3>\n
\"Matthew
Photography: Friends via Facebook<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

According to Athenna Crosby, a friend of Matthew Perry\u2019s who met him the day before he died, he was \u201chappy and vibrant\u201d before he passed. During the course of their time together, he was still cracking jokes and speaking cheerfully. He even discussed plans about turning his memoir into a movie, telling his friend that he wanted Zac Efron to play the younger version of himself. And if you remember the fact that both Matthew Perry and Zac Efron starred in 17 Again together, you\u2019ll know how adorable this idea was.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s hard to believe with all this information that the comedian was anything but happy before his death. However, the curse of the funny friend is one that continues to haunt us even now. It\u2019s fun to crack jokes to get a smile on everyone\u2019s face on a regular day. But based on the consensus of funny people all over the internet, it isn\u2019t all it\u2019s cracked up to be. You put yourself in a position where you\u2019re expected to be happy all the time, and that in itself takes a toll.<\/p>\n

While we can\u2019t say for sure whether Matthew Perry\u2019s death was a suicide or not (since we\u2019re still waiting on that toxicology report), it\u2019s a sign to check in with that friend of yours who always seems to be in good spirits. Are they sweeping negative thoughts under the rug while you\u2019re out with your friend group? Did they have a chance to get something off their chest? We\u2019re all ears.<\/p>\n

Addiction and recovery aren\u2019t linear<\/h3>\n
\"matthew
Photography: Matthew Perry via Instagram<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

One of the things that made Matthew Perry an inspiration is his openness in addressing his addiction and his many attempts at recovery. A jet ski accident in 1997 was the beginning of his increasing struggle with Vicodin and worsening alcoholism. His rehabilitation was an up-and-down battle, becoming almost uncontrollable when he shot to fame at 24. His drug use continued after Friends, well into his late 40s when he came face to face with death not once, but twice. It hasn\u2019t even been that long since Matthew Perry made a (mostly) full recovery, stating publicly in June 2022 that he was pretty healthy.<\/p>\n

I\u2019m not an addict by any means, but there\u2019s something to be learned from his recovery journey. Despite giving sage advice to fellow addicts and even converting his former Malibu home into a sober living facility, the comedian struggled to stay consistently clean. After clinging on to his sobriety for 18 months, he talked about how he felt more anger than relief. In his memoir, he even asked the question, \u201cWhy have I been spared?\u201d<\/p>\n

Although we instinctually understand the negative consequences of drugs and addiction, going through the motions of removing these parts of your life isn\u2019t an easy feat when they might be the only consistency you\u2019ve known. The road is tumultuous and you might end up slipping back into old habits, as Matthew Perry did time and again. But it\u2019s always worse before it gets better. Just because you\u2019re in the midst of figuring out how to recover, it doesn\u2019t have to stop you from extending advice and help to others.<\/p>\n

Reflecting on depression<\/h3>\n
\"Matthew
Photography: The Ron Clark Story<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

After Robin Williams’ suicide in 2014, the world began to reconsider what it meant to experience depression. Being depressed doesn\u2019t only look like curling up in bed or being sad all the time. It also looks like a facade of cheerfulness, productivity, and affection \u2013 everything the greatest comedian in the world encompassed.<\/p>\n

It was no secret that Matthew Perry had demons that he fought alongside his addiction. While fellow Friends cast members were sobbing their eyes out as they wrapped the series finale, he was left feeling empty. If he hadn\u2019t said it out loud in interviews, it\u2019s likely we would\u2019ve never known how affected he was. Truth be told, even though I\u2019m aware he spent most of his career depressed, it\u2019s hard to reconcile the notion as I continue binging his filmography.<\/p>\n

There’s a theory that depression makes the best creatives. So maybe it\u2019s not all that surprising to know comics like Robin Williams and Matthew Perry were plagued with ominous and haunting thoughts. But that\u2019s an unfortunate price to pay for the cost of their art. Even when promoting his deeply personal and profound memoir, Matthew Perry joked, \u201cI apologise it\u2019s not a pop-up book.\u201d<\/a> It just goes to show that depression has a way of sneaking up on you to throw you a painful curveball. And no amount of success or money can cure that.<\/p>\n

Take the leap \u2013 but not literally<\/h3>\n
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A post shared by Lucy Claire Dunbar (@lucyclaireillustration)<\/a><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/blockquote>\n