{"id":270623,"date":"2023-03-08T12:00:26","date_gmt":"2023-03-08T04:00:26","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/thehoneycombers.com\/singapore\/?p=270623"},"modified":"2023-03-10T13:17:57","modified_gmt":"2023-03-10T05:17:57","slug":"female-sexologist-in-singapore","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/thehoneycombers.com\/singapore\/female-sexologist-in-singapore\/","title":{"rendered":"The ups and downs of being a female sexologist in Singapore: From discrimination and misconceptions to building up relationships"},"content":{"rendered":"

As a female relationship counsellor<\/a> and clinical sexologist in Singapore, I\u2019ve had the opportunity to work with a wide variety of clients and support them in their personal lives. I\u2019ve always been interested in human interactions. Eventually, I came to view sex and sexuality as important contributors to our well-being. When I was at the crossroads of my life, I decided to pursue a career as a sexologist because I realised I\u2019d much rather support people in their personal lives than be part of the rat race. I went on to earn my Doctorate in Human Sexuality, followed by my Master’s in Counselling in addition to my other two degrees – including a Bachelor’s in Mass Communications.<\/p>\n

\"sexologist
Helping people improve their relationships is one of the most rewarding parts of what I do.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

It\u2019s incredibly rewarding to help people improve their relationships and sex lives. The best thing about my job is seeing the glimmer of hope on the faces of clients, reigniting the spark of light in their eyes and, of course, helping them overcome their sexual difficulties and achieve a more fulfilling life. But, there are challenges and misconceptions about sexology that can lead to judgment from others.<\/p>\n

Dealing with misconception, discrimination and judgment<\/h3>\n
\"sexologist
Photography: Nik via Unsplash<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

I didn\u2019t know what to expect when I started my practice in 2009. I was quickly faced with people who assumed I was a sex worker<\/a>, that I offered massages, or gave medications. Others in Singapore imagined that being a sexologist means you\u2019re promoting promiscuity or encouraging people to engage in immoral behaviour. But it\u2019s important to remember that sexologists simply help people to understand their own sexuality and have healthy relationships<\/a>.<\/p>\n

I\u2019ve had to grapple with the gender roles that society imposed on me. Yes, I\u2019ve experienced the invisible glass ceiling that limits opportunities for women in the workplace and beyond. I\u2019ve also felt like I needed to be strong and independent yet \u201cfeminine\u201d enough to be accepted by society. And I\u2019ve fought against the objectification of women as sexual objects or objects for men\u2019s use. Through this, I dug deep and examined who I am and what I believe in, and stood up for myself – never letting anyone define me by their standards.<\/p>\n

My personal lived experience<\/h3>\n

The #MeToo movement has been a powerful force in bringing to light the prevalence of sexual harassment and assault experienced by women. As a sex-positive, feminist, and empowered female in my line of work, I\u2019ve seen first-hand the impact of these experiences on women\u2019s lives. That includes physical and emotional trauma like depression, anxiety, and post-traumatic stress disorder, as well as continued struggles in experiencing pleasure, and difficulties trusting others and forming relationships.<\/p>\n

I\u2019ve experienced sexual harassment at work and dealt with the fear and anxiety that comes with it. I\u2019ve also had the unfortunate experience of being a victim of sexual assault in my personal life. These are experiences that left me feeling scared, violated and helpless, and I continue to work through them.<\/p>\n

A call for change<\/h3>\n
\"sexologist
Photography: Omar Lopez via Unsplash<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Women ought to be seen as individuals with their own thoughts, feelings and experiences – not objects. Respect the decisions they make and don\u2019t assume you know what\u2019s best for them.<\/p>\n

Unfortunately, discrimination still exists in our society. Women get paid less than men for the same job, without being given the same respect as their male counterparts. We should all work towards creating a more equitable world by advocating for equal pay, challenging gender stereotypes, and creating safe spaces for dialogue about gender issues.<\/p>\n

Let\u2019s encourage men to cheer women on in their pursuits, advocate for female colleagues at the workplace, and help with household tasks (without feeling like they\u2019re taking away from their masculinity). It\u2019s my hope that men can allow themselves to be vulnerable, honest, and open about their feelings – that it\u2019s okay to cry and show emotion without feeling like they\u2019re any less of a man.<\/p>\n

In light of International Women\u2019s Day, let\u2019s come together to support people regardless of gender identity and sexual orientation, to recognise that many are limited and struggling because of the bodies they were born into, and have compassion, empathy, and support for those around us. Let\u2019s do our part in creating a more equitable and just world for everyone.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

As a female relationship counsellor and clinical sexologist in Singapore, I\u2019ve had the opportunity to work with a wide variety of clients and support them in their personal lives. I\u2019ve always been interested in human interactions. Eventually, I came to view sex and sexuality as important contributors to our well-being. When I was at the […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":107523,"featured_media":270757,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false},"categories":[25084],"tags":[134155],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nThe ups and downs of being a female sexologist in Singapore<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"From dealing with discrimination to the impact of sexual harassment, this is what it's like to be a female sexologist in Singapore.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/thehoneycombers.com\/singapore\/female-sexologist-in-singapore\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_GB\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"The ups and downs of being a female sexologist in Singapore: From discrimination and misconceptions to 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