{"id":266658,"date":"2023-01-13T12:30:18","date_gmt":"2023-01-13T04:30:18","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/thehoneycombers.com\/singapore\/?p=266658"},"modified":"2023-01-13T12:30:19","modified_gmt":"2023-01-13T04:30:19","slug":"when-you-are-socially-awkward","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/thehoneycombers.com\/singapore\/when-you-are-socially-awkward\/","title":{"rendered":"From weakness to strength: Why being socially awkward can be a superpower in the workplace"},"content":{"rendered":"

Throughout my life, I\u2019ve found it challenging to hold small talk<\/a>, fit in, and know the right way to respond in certain situations. Some people say this is normal. But while I\u2019ve gotten much better at all of the above, I\u2019ve experienced enough to know I\u2019m just a bit socially awkward.<\/p>\n

Take this for example: When I was working my first job in public relations, my colleagues ambushed me with a cake on my birthday. That was when I realised I didn\u2019t know how to respond to surprises. Most people would break out in oohs and aahs, or show outward displays of excitement. But I simply froze and gawked at them for an extended amount of seconds (that felt like an eternity).<\/p>\n

As you can imagine, this inability to instinctively understand what to say or do made a career in client servicing onerous. Over time, I adopted the self-limiting belief that it made me less capable. Just Google the term \u2018socially awkward\u2019, and you\u2019ll find myriad articles on how you can (or must<\/em>) overcome it to be successful.<\/p>\n

But after a few years in the workforce (and a couple of job hops<\/a> to boot), I\u2019ve realised one thing: being socially awkward can be a surprising strength. This isn\u2019t about \u201cgetting over\u201d something I struggle with. I\u2019m flipping the script. This is why awkward people rule<\/em>.<\/p>\n

What it means to be socially awkward<\/h2>\n
\"socially
Photography: Belinda Fewings via Unsplash<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

While everyone experiences moments of awkwardness from time to time, about 15% of the population truly struggle with social awkwardness. It\u2019s not a mental health condition, a sign of introversion<\/a>, or shyness. Instead, experts say it\u2019s a collection of experiences that show a lack of intuitive sense to manage routine expectations (especially in social situations).<\/p>\n

\u201cPeople who are socially awkward may fail to notice particular social cues, misunderstand an intention or body language, or have difficulty responding appropriately in general social settings,\u201d says Diana, counselling psychologist at Annabelle Psychology<\/a>.<\/p>\n

\u201cThey might not be aware that they have to make eye contact when they speak to others, to shake hands when greeting someone, and to say goodbye when leaving,\u201d adds founder and senior clinical psychologist Muhammad Haikal Bin Jamil, and associate psychologist Foong Yoke Kaye of ImPossible Psych Services<\/a>.<\/p>\n

In essence, we\u2019re not entirely<\/em> \u201cnormal\u201d\u2026 But that\u2019s okay. Why? Because being socially awkward can be a superpower.<\/p>\n

The (surprising) advantages of being an oddball in the workplace<\/h3>\n
\"the
Photography: Yan Krukau via Pexels<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

We see the world in a different light, and this can be advantageous in roles that require vast amounts of creativity or thinking out of the box. Haikal and Yoke Kaye tell me that people who are socially awkward have unique views about areas of life that usually go unnoticed.<\/p>\n

Think about the TV series The Mysterious Benedict Society<\/a>, and you\u2019ll catch my drift. It\u2019s a show about four children who go on a journey to save the world. They\u2019re all a little odd and awkward in ways, yet their uncommon personalities and perspectives make them a formidable quartet.<\/p>\n

\u201cSocially awkward people make great additions to teams as they provide different perspectives. This reduces the likelihood of groupthink,\u201d Diana says, referencing a phenomenon where people prioritise group consensus over the best solution. \u201cThey may not feel the need to fit into social norms. This reduces the obstacles they face in deciding what they want to do and striving towards their goals.\u201d<\/p>\n

There\u2019s power in our passion. Socially awkward individuals are great at mastering skills and holding proficient conversations in matters we care about. We may not be a jack of all trades, but we\u2019re sure as hell the master of one. This means we have the propensity to excel at unconventional or creative careers like artists or entrepreneurs (or in my case, a writer with a penchant for topics like this).<\/p>\n

Though we may struggle with surface-level interactions, we\u2019re great at building meaningful ones. In comparison to a disingenuous person with a glib tongue, socially awkward people lean towards honesty and sincerity. \u201cThey\u2019re more likely to form lasting relationships, which helps with connecting and networking \u2013 even if they didn\u2019t intentionally set out to do so,\u201d Diana explains.<\/p>\n

Love yourself, work on yourself<\/h3>\n
\"socially
Photography: Brooke Cagle via Unsplash<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

We should be proud of who we are. Our awkwardness adds more to the world than what it takes from it. Mix all this with opportunities for self-growth, and you\u2019ll find overwhelming confidence to take on new challenges and social situations. Here are some helpful tips from experts to build on your strengths.<\/p>\n

1. Work on first impressions<\/h4>\n

According to Haikal and Yoke Kaye, the majority of people form judgments about an individual\u2019s likability within a matter of seconds. This means first impressions count the most. Even if you\u2019re worried about how you might perform during a conversation or meeting, you\u2019ve already won half the battle by showing up with an amiable vibe. \u201cRemember: an energetic stance, a smile, and a friendly tone always help,\u201d they advise.<\/p>\n

2. Practice and persevere<\/h4>\n
\"socially
Photography: Polina Tankilevitch via Pexels<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

The saying ‘practice makes perfect\u2019 holds more than an ounce of truth. You might feel inclined to withdraw from social situations to avoid awkwardness, but the more you practise, the easier it will get. Trust me \u2013 I\u2019m (almost) a whiz at chatting to everyone now.<\/p>\n

\u201cIf you\u2019re naturally socially awkward, remember three \u201crules\u201d or expectations of a social situation first: smile, look into the person\u2019s eyes when you greet them and ask them how the event is going,\u201d Haikal and Yoke Kaye say. \u201cWork on mastering this, and you\u2019ll feel less anxious and more assured in picking up the social rhythm.\u201d<\/p>\n

Diana suggests practising with a trusted person if you\u2019re afraid. You can even sign up for social skills training under the guidance of a mental health professional<\/a> if you feel you need more help.<\/p>\n

3. Be kind to yourself<\/h4>\n

A bit of self-compassion goes a long way. Remember that everyone experiences awkward moments of their own from time to time. Haikal and Yoke Kaye remind us that these moments rarely ever carry any dire consequences. So laugh it off and embrace the awkwardness of the situation!<\/p>\n

\u201cIn the same vein, be compassionate when someone is in a socially awkward situation,\u201d Diana says. \u201cGive an acknowledging smile or simply say, \u2018don\u2019t worry about it, it happens to all of us\u2019.\u201d<\/p>\n

Feeling blue from the last interaction you thought you blundered at work? This is a reminder that you\u2019re pretty cool, and that being a little socially awkward doesn\u2019t have to hold you down. It didn\u2019t stop me, that\u2019s for sure!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Throughout my life, I\u2019ve found it challenging to hold small talk, fit in, and know the right way to respond in certain situations. Some people say this is normal. But while I\u2019ve gotten much better at all of the above, I\u2019ve experienced enough to know I\u2019m just a bit socially awkward. Take this for example: […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":107571,"featured_media":266660,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false},"categories":[137317],"tags":[145600],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nOpinion: Being socially awkward is a workplace superpower<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Feeling socially awkward? 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