{"id":243981,"date":"2021-11-08T15:46:10","date_gmt":"2021-11-08T07:46:10","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/thehoneycombers.com\/singapore\/?p=243981"},"modified":"2021-11-08T15:46:10","modified_gmt":"2021-11-08T07:46:10","slug":"screenshot-text-message-conversation","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/thehoneycombers.com\/singapore\/screenshot-text-message-conversation\/","title":{"rendered":"Is it OK to screenshot and share a private conversation?"},"content":{"rendered":"

Call it what you will: screenshots, receipts, insurance or blackmail. Whether we use it for good or bad, we\u2019re all guilty. From Jade Rasif<\/a> using screenshots to talk about Covid<\/a> quarantine regulations to the recent saga with Night Owl Cinematics (NOC), where countless leaked screenshots of allegedly private text messages were systematically used in the takedown of one of their own \u2013 co-founder Sylvia Chan. After so many celebrities have fallen prey, why do we still do it?<\/p>\n

So, I took to Instagram and did a poll. I asked what you\u2019d do when speaking with a close friend about a grievance you have about work. Is it OK to use harsh language? And for those in relationships \u2013 is it acceptable to screenshot text messages from your significant other with the intention to scrutinise? What about the ethics of it? Is that even legal? And should you inform the person you\u2019re talking to that you\u2019ve taken a screenshot of the convo?<\/p>\n

Honestly, the results surprised me. Take a look below.<\/p>\n

The majority voted: Even if ranting to a friend, always be tactful<\/h3>\n
\"ok
Photography: Jill Lim via Instagram<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

This was one of the poll outcomes that shocked me. I don\u2019t fully believe the people who voted either. In an ideal world, sure, everyone should watch their anger, control their tongue and be tactful. As Michelle Obama says, \u201cwhen they go low, we go high.\u201d That\u2019s what politically correct, passive-aggressive, cryptic statuses are for.<\/p>\n

But when I\u2019m annoyed about something and I choose to confide in a friend, I\u2019m not watching my words. I\u2019m unleashing my anger! That\u2019s probably something we need to change. Especially since pop culture is littered with examples of private conversations and texts somehow getting out.<\/p>\n

The majority voted: When frustrated about work, it\u2019s OK to screenshot texts to share with close friends<\/h3>\n

Another shocker here. Many of the direct messages I later received were follow-ups explaining what they meant. Quite a number said they tend to screenshot messages or emails and send them to a close friend to get their opinion.<\/p>\n

Was it too pointed? Was it a confusing email? Were the instructions unclear? Sure, I\u2019ll bite. I\u2019m guilty of that. However, if I\u2019m being completely honest, those screenshots for \u201cclarification purposes\u201d are often followed with, \u201cIs this client stupid or what?\u201d<\/p>\n

It\u2019s not tactful in the slightest, but I\u2019m talking to a close friend I trust\u2026 right? Sadly, as pop culture has told us, wrong. Just look at the sex tape scandals of Kim Kardashian and Kevin Hart. That\u2019s not all. Even Amazon founder Jeff Bezos wasn\u2019t spared when his intimate texts to his girlfriend were leaked. Well, if billionaires aren\u2019t safe!<\/p>\n

The majority voted: Screenshots are often taken out of context<\/h3>\n
\"ok
Photography: Keira Burton via Pexels<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Finally, a result I agree with. Back to the NOC drama: after Sylvia had her say with the Xiaxue interview<\/a>, it was revealed that her partner and ex-husband Ryan Tan supposedly had a habit of recording conversations. He\u2019s not alone. We\u2019ve seen people in Singapore taking photos of others not wearing masks. Or recording awful situations instead of helping them.<\/p>\n

So, is it ethical to screenshot conversations? We\u2019ve all been there at the start of a relationship when a friend screenshots a crush\u2019s message asking you what it means or how they should reply. Or Facebook\u2019s favourite screenshots: the type between parents and their teenagers. They always provide a good laugh. Unfortunately, it still feels like screenshots are used more and more for evil than good.<\/p>\n

The majority voted: When it comes to relationships, screenshots provide a clearer picture<\/h3>\n

All my Instagram polls above were done in the context of work \u2013 ranting about a situation, a boss or a colleague. But what about relationships? If you\u2019re having an argument with your significant other and you take a screenshot of the text to send to a friend for input, is that acceptable? I was horrified when most of my followers thought it was a great idea to provide the \u201cneutral\u201d party with a better picture of the fight.<\/p>\n

But if you\u2019re taking screenshots of your quarrel with your partner and sending it to a close friend, that party is never \u201cneutral\u201d. And I can\u2019t think of a bigger betrayal of trust than this. It doesn\u2019t matter whether you want a fresh perspective or to understand why they\u2019re upset. You just don\u2019t do that. Most of all, when you\u2019re having a tiff, whatever you\u2019ve screenshot is probably a snippet of a longer back and forth. Chances are, it\u2019s the ugliest part of the other person. Now, whoever you\u2019re sending this screenshot to has an altered view of your partner.<\/p>\n

It doesn\u2019t matter if you record the whole exchange of texts. It\u2019s still just one conversation out of an entire relationship. The only people who know what\u2019s acceptable to them are the people in the relationship. So, no. This was a result that shocked and disappointed me.<\/p>\n

The majority voted: You judge the person in the text more than the person sending the screenshot<\/h3>\n
\"ok
Photography: Jill Lim via Instagram<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

I threw out this scenario: Jane and Mike are your friends who just had a row. Jane sends you a screenshot of the squabble where Mike\u2019s being unreasonable. While I\u2019d likely think less of Mike at the moment, in the grand scheme of things, I\u2019d look at Jane differently as well.<\/p>\n

Is she sending my conversations with her to other people when we have disagreements? Did she send me this screenshot hoping I\u2019d immediately side with her? Is she taking a screenshot of my reply now and sending it to someone else to talk about why I\u2019m not siding with her? Will she show Mike my replies? The mind games, the paranoia, the anxiety!<\/p>\n

The majority voted: When you receive a screenshot, it stops at you<\/h3>\n

When I get a screenshot of someone else\u2019s conversation, it totally stops at me. Until my husband gets home from work, and we discuss it over dinner. Then it stops at us. Until he goes to work at his barbershop and uses it as a point of discussion with his clients. Then it stops there. Unless his clients find it particularly interesting and share it with their friends\u2026 you see where I\u2019m going with this.<\/p>\n

To screenshot or not?<\/h3>\n

Who knew the power of our opposable thumbs? (Until they were used to take screenshots on our phones.) So, knowing that the majority of text leaks come from close friends, and when you\u2019re in a rage you rarely control how you say things, why do we still do it? Do we forgive people who\u2019ve done it to us because it\u2019s the norm? Will this make any difference in the way we conduct ourselves through text messaging? Or will this bring about the return of actual phone calls?<\/p>\n

If nothing else, it makes me look at my circle of friends that much closer.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Call it what you will: screenshots, receipts, insurance or blackmail. Whether we use it for good or bad, we\u2019re all guilty. From Jade Rasif using screenshots to talk about Covid quarantine regulations to the recent saga with Night Owl Cinematics (NOC), where countless leaked screenshots of allegedly private text messages were systematically used in the […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":107525,"featured_media":243984,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[145379],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nIs it OK to screenshot and share text conversations? | Honeycombers<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"People screenshot text messages and share them for many reasons, but when does it cross the line? 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