We’re all about making some positive change around here with a little Monday motivation and food for thought. Our first #MondayMindset is all about all about how we identify our own limiting beliefs and kick their butt so we can move forward!
What’s your mindset today? Do you feel organised, inspired and ready to take on the world, or overwhelmed and just plain stuck? We’re all about enjoying life to the fullest here at Honeycombers, but it isn’t all just about indulging in amazing food and experiences. (Believe us, we love all of that.) We’re talking about the small changes we can make to see our Mondays (or any slump in our week) in a different light. We’re kicking off our series of #MondayMindset columns with three tips from Grace Clapham of The Change School on how to tackle your own limiting beliefs and give yourself the best shot of showing everyone what you’ve got.
But first, what are limiting beliefs?
Limiting beliefs are anything that holds us back and keep us from moving forward. You see, over the years our belief systems are built up from the people, events, circumstances, experiences we’ve encountered. The beliefs then shape our mindset, what we believe we can do, how we interact with others and perceptions of the world we live in.
It is through these beliefs that have been imprinted within us and our minds that we make conclusions on how things should be, or are. We limit ourselves because of this and we may even feel trapped or stuck in our life. Only once we’re able to work through our limiting beliefs can we start moving through life with the joie de vivre one should always have!
Let’s face our limiting beliefs this week with these three tips:
1. Seek forgiveness
Love yourself – accept yourself – forgive yourself – and be good to yourself, because without you the rest of us are without a source of many wonderful things.
– Leo F. Buscaglia
This may seem a little odd at first but trust us it works… we learnt this exercise from author Louise Hay and have adapted it a little bit.We’re not asking you to seek forgiveness from others but actually from yourself. With all the years of baggage that we carry we need to start forgiving ourselves for our past mistakes, any shame, self-blame or any guilt we’re carrying. By doing this simple exercise we will allow our negative emotions attached to any past situation come to the forefront and slowly chip away at it, allowing us to feel lighter, brighter and happier.
Here’s what we want you to do:
- Create a quiet space and set some nice relaxing music.
- Get a pen and a pack of index cards (or you can write them all on one piece of paper).
- Write down all your limiting beliefs, all your moments that you felt pain, unhappiness, struggle, conflict, grief – all your “low” moments, all of the moments you perhaps regret, or your mistakes. You can write one moment on one index card.
- Once you’ve done that read out each moment out loud, imagining yourself back in that moment and then say out loud at least two times each:
“I forgive myself for ______________”
“I give myself permission to move forward and set myself free from my past”
“I release my _______________(insert limiting belief)”
If you have a lot of moments that you need to “release” and move past then look at doing one or two a day each morning. The aim is not to do this as fast as possible but to really feel it and have this as your part of your ritual in the morning.
Do this over and over again. It’s amazing how much lighter you will feel after. The more this becomes a habit the less you will hold on to negative emotions, situations and limiting beliefs.
2. Stop comparing yourself. Be okay WITH YOU!
When does comparing ourselves ever help? Really be honest with yourself: can you share a moment when comparing yourself has helped you? When we constantly compare ourselves with others we only ever become more insecure, more doubtful of our potential, more likely to not take action because we will be fearful of not doing things the “right way”or “as good as X”.
For this week we suggest you try and monitor each time you’re likely to compare yourself to someone or each time that feeling of self-doubt comes in. There will always be people who are more intelligent, wealthier, more successful, more fit, etc than you. Each time you catch yourself comparing yourself to others ask yourself, WHY do you think they are better than you? What do they do that you feel you should be doing and WHY? Take note, write it down or just make a mental note. After that re-focus your energy and attention on your strengths, on being okay with your imperfections and most importantly be grateful for what you have and where you are today.
We are where we are meant to be and you never know what that person you are comparing yourself to is facing in their own world.
3. Reframe your words and thoughts
In order to change our minds we need to change the words we use. In this last tip we want to share some simple ways for you to reframe your thoughts and words so that you can expand your mind and what’s possible, think big and stop living in limitations.
Reframing the way we think will empower us to start acting in new ways. For example if we feel we aren’t good at relationships or making new connections, your actions will follow in this belief. You might become awkward when new people reach out to you or when you’re at networking events. You might limit your engagements and hold yourself back from opening conversations and discussions. However, if you are able to re-frame your thinking you will open yourself up more to speaking to new people, perhaps even say yes to some of those events you’ve been missing out on. And open up a whole new world you might really enjoy!
Here’s some ways you can reframe common words we use and turn the negative into a positive
PROBLEM > reframed = Challenge
MISTAKE > reframed = Lesson
CRISIS > reframed = Opportunity
IMPATIENT > reframed = Eager, Excited
Remember what we believe impacts us on every level. Let’s not let our negative thoughts and self-doubt control us.
Remember that beliefs are not facts and can be changed.
Remember that it takes repetition and change doesn’t happen overnight!
Now is the best time to start moving beyond our limiting beliefs and show up in the world in the way you know you can!