{"id":167102,"date":"2020-04-24T07:24:48","date_gmt":"2020-04-23T23:24:48","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/thehoneycombers.com\/hong-kong\/?p=167102"},"modified":"2020-04-23T15:36:45","modified_gmt":"2020-04-23T07:36:45","slug":"ode-to-a-bedside-table","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/thehoneycombers.com\/hong-kong\/ode-to-a-bedside-table\/","title":{"rendered":"Ode to a bedside table (and other inanimate objects I miss while living in Hong Kong)"},"content":{"rendered":"

It\u2019s night time. I\u2019ve been waking myself up with a large snore as my head nods off for the last five minutes or so, but I really want to get to the end of this chapter before I officially turn in for the night. Alas, my body has other ideas, and as I quietly accept the fact that it\u2019s time for slumber, I remember the thing that sets my mind raging every single night: I have no bedside table.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat a stupid thing to dwell on. I could live totally fine without a bedside table. This lady has lost the plot!\u201d I hear you saying these things in your mind while you read this, but let me tell you, it\u2019s a sad, sad life; this life sans bedside table. I wouldn\u2019t wish it upon my worst enemy.<\/p>\n

I mean, when you\u2019re falling asleep on your book, the last thing you want to do is crawl down your bed that only just fits in your Hong Kong-sized bedroom\u2013no, you can\u2019t lie across it horizontally\u2013and get up and dump that MOFO in the living room: nah-uh! There\u2019s nowhere for glasses to rest safely during the night, nowhere to stash the hoard of pills you now find yourself taking every evening and the requisite glass of water, there\u2019s just nowhere to put things, and you soon realise that this tiny little storage object means the world to you.<\/p>\n

Ode to a bedside table<\/h3>\n

Oh wood! Oh wood that holds together<\/em>
\nSplendid does your majesty be.<\/em>
\nBetwixt the pale form where I doth slumber<\/em>
\nThou perfect form on floor does rest,<\/em>
\nAnd carry nightly weight I beg of you;<\/em>
\nFor only those without could ever know<\/em>
\nThe importance of that drawer of which you hide.<\/em><\/p>\n

If I had a dollar for every time I uttered: \u201cOne day, we\u2019ll live in a house with bedside tables,\u201d then I would have quite a few more dollars than I have now. Also inside this glorious house that lies in my future will be an oven.<\/p>\n

Ovens make life so much easier, but most small HK apartments don\u2019t have them. Sure, you can grab one of those little counter top ones, but it\u2019s just not the same, especially when you want to prepare a Bacchanalian-style dinner party. How many times have you been to a friend\u2019s apartment and coveted their oven? In Hong Kong that\u2019s a normal state of being.<\/p>\n

After I have somewhere to place my latest tome, and a machine to roast copious amounts of vegetables to my heart\u2019s content in, I will ensure that my new home has running hot water in the kitchen and bathroom sinks. I can\u2019t tell you how many apartments I have lived in in Hong Kong where the sinks only run cold water. But why though?<\/p>\n

It\u2019s a cruel and unusual annoyance. How are you meant to do the dishes? How are you meant to wash your face?<\/p>\n

\"ode
I mean… is this too much to ask for?<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

And speaking about washing things, can we talk about baths? I honestly think there\u2019s a business in just renting really amazing bath pods out by the hour here. It sounds kind of gross when I say it out loud, but think high class bathing, with really lush products and bubbles for days and a button you can push to order wine and canapes. <\/p>\n

At our last apartment, they\u2019d removed the bath to put in a really poorly designed rain shower that you couldn\u2019t use because it flooded over the side of the tiny shower cubicle. What kind of sadist does that to a gal who just wants to come home and draw a sexy AF bath once in a while?<\/p>\n